I Hope To Be Transformed In Twelve Weeks!


Sunday night I made a covenant to walk through the twelve week course of the ‘Experiencing God’ study, by Henry Blackaby.  As I woke up on Monday morning, I struggled with my emotions.  I could not figure out what was God’s prompting or what was my fear: fear for this day and for all of my tomorrows.   So I laced up my sneakers and began to run.  Lately this self-inflicted torture has become  my way to process and deal with stress.

I forgot to charge my iPod, so the run consisted of the sounds of the great outdoors and my feet striking the pavement.  I clocked my time and set my pace; then I began to pray.

Dear God, Please guard my mind from the lies of the enemy.  Please help me to know what thoughts are Your thoughts and what thoughts are fears from the past.  Help me to know Your truth.  Father, help me to know where You are at work today and lead me to join You.  As I start this new study, please transform my life and lead me on the perfect path that You planned long ago for my life.  Your will be done.

I ran to the top of the hill and paused to jog in place for just a few moments to enjoy the morning sun and to adjust my stride for the downhill trek.  I learned the hard way that it’s usually the downhill running that causes an injury.  As I continued on my morning journey I decided that the time in prayer and listening to God was too sweet to stop, so I ran the same circuit again.  I adjusted my stride as I made it to the top of the very steep incline and once again began the descent.  Then suddenly it hit me!  So often we struggle through the difficult things in life and come out stronger on the other side, but then we fail to realize that the plateaus, or the “easier” downhill paths in life, are where we can lose proper perspective.  We often think we are stronger than we are and end up with shin splints or something much worse.

I have learned a lot of life lessons through my learning how to physically run.  Sadly, some of my lessons have come the hard way because, well, I can be just as stubborn and arrogant as the next person.  Ouch!  There’s a hard truth to swallow.

I started to make my way down the steep incline, but this time I chose to slow myself down and proceed with caution.  It’s okay not to be as fast or as strong as the others who are running.  What’s important in our race is that we finish well.

I started to ask myself a few questions while I prayed through my uncertainties.

Why do we rush through life so fast?  So often we miss today trying to reach for tomorrow’s answers.  Where does this anxiety come from and why do I feel the need to know what all tomorrow holds?  Could this be the same anxiety, or spirit, that lured Adam and Eve to eat from the only tree that God said not to?  They had full freedom and unhindered communion with God, yet they forfeited peace by rebelling against the one and only “No” command that God gave.   Why do we do this?  Maybe the phrase “curiosity killed the cat”* came from the Garden Of Eden!

“You will not certainly die,” the serpent said to the woman.  “For God knows that when you eat from it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.” -Genesis 3:4-5

Along my running path Monday morning, with a sun-filled sky, I found myself half way down “my hill” and all the uncertainties still raw in my emotions.  There, I chose to let go of tomorrow and allowed God to reign.  I don’t know much more than this moment but God does, so it’s ok that I don’t have the answers.  All I need to know is that I am where I am supposed to be today – seeking and trusting God.  He has always told me when to take my next step, so in this silent season my heart knows I can trust Him.

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.  Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things.  Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.” – Matthew 6:33-34

My prayer remains, “ Father, help me to know where You are at work today and lead me to join You.”  With each decision to trust God, this prayer truly becomes my heart.

Please pray for me and the rest of the group of people whom I am joining with in this study, ‘Experiencing God.’  We are learning to press into God as individuals and as a church body, so that we can know Him deeper and be a part of His great and victorious plan.

Will you purpose with me to seek God in a real and intimate way?  Will you, or have you, chosen a relationship with Him over a religious experience?  Are you willing to release past hurts,  fears, and pride, so you can know Him personally?

In all my disappointments and painful moments in life, God has never failed me.  Therefore, I will set my mind on all the victories I’ve tasted today.  He holds tomorrow.  Will I be transformed in twelve weeks?  I hope so, but the transformation will certainly not be complete.

~Shannan

2011, Keeping It Real!

*Here’s a little funny I remembered from childhood as I wrote out my thoughts about a curious kitty!  The Cat Came Back Life’s not so bad ;o)

5 Comments

  1. 08/17/2011 at 11:50

    […] not be conformed to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and […]

  2. Delores Christofferson said,

    08/17/2011 at 11:50

    I find the ‘entrance of you word gives light’, Ps.119:130 helpful. It is the word of God that goes to work in us to bring forth fruit that remains Hebrews 4:12. We must let the word ( only ) into our eyegate. The eye is the entrance to the soul which satan tries to steal so if we spend time reading, we do renew the mind and the word heals and comforts. One thing I’ve learned is that I’m not to strive to do anything but come into the rest ! Also in Hebrews. Jesus already did the hard part but we have to recieve it. John 6:28-29, just believe on HIM.
    Each time I read a book, it is another persons perception of what to do but Jesus does not want us to ‘ do ‘ anything but seek His face and ‘be’. Just as Mary did. Martha was up doing but Mary just sat and loved His every word. I hope this is of some help. Much love sent your way, Dodi

    • 08/17/2011 at 11:50

      Dodi, I find it very interesting and encouraging that you used the words, “Jesus does not want us to ‘ do ‘ anything but seek His face and ‘be’” A couple of years ago God said these very words to me, “Just be”. I have to admit this is very hard for me. I feel lazy so I get up and “do” all kinds of stuff. Literally from the day Warren died I have been asked, “So what are you going to do now Shannan?” All from well meaning people who love me deeply, but the pressure of not “being” something has made me wrestle with God to truly know my self-worth. It’s really only been in the last six months I feel I’ve been able to grab hold of the fact that God does love me. What I realized is that the love God has for me is so deep, so vast, and so wide, that I cannot understand it. It’s in that inability to understand that we think His love simply does not exist. BUT IT DOES!!!! I may not be much according to our culture’s standards, but I trust God is leading me and answering my prayers, and allowing me to leave an eternal love impact on this world before my time is over. You are a treasure Dodi!

  3. Delores Christofferson said,

    08/18/2011 at 11:50

    Just remember we can’t make Him love us any more than He does and we can’t make Him love any less either. Eph. 2:8-10 it is by GRACE you’ve been saved – thru faith -and that not of yourself, it is ‘the gift’ from God.
    The more we have Him as center…11 Cor.3:18, when we read, listen, seek and praise we are changed from Glory to Glory. He makes you stronger, more beautiful, you rise higher and have clearer understanding because you are being formed into HIS image. You are building your house on the Rock. Nothing can touch you & in this day and time we need to be ready for His coming. We need the light of His Gospel (good news,anointing) shining in us as the time is near. That light was what Adam and Eve had as protection & now we have that because of Jesus & the cross. Be Still & Know He is God. Recieve His peace and walk in confidence. He Loves You no matter what !

  4. 08/25/2011 at 11:50

    That is such a needed reminder. Thank you!


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